we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
the beat of "birthday sex" is shockingly similar to my dry heaving rhythm. it's making me nauseous all over again.
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
I'm puking to John Mayor, save me. Or at least change it to somethong beyyt
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
I deserve a medal for being woke up at 6am on my day off by your mother asking where your brother is
Randomize
