I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
If my vag had twitter, what do you think it would say?
i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
i actually looked down at my cock today and said "whoa buddy, you need a haircut....(grimace) and a shower"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
so i think im going to actually use my calories on food today instead of beer.
Burger king has cupcake flavored milkshakes. God dammit America.
Ughhh I can't remember the last time "time fell back or springed forward" and I wasn't at the bar to argue about it :(
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
Randomize