I puked in a mailbox on the way back from your house.
she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
I guess he was telling a totally normal story about being a lifeguard and I wouldn't stop screaming "THAT'S LUDICROUS" at random intervals.
Until then we have the self affirmation from retweets and nights alone with pizza..
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
I wish people could trade lives with me for a day so they could see how much better my life is compared to theirs
Okay. Did I say I did anything unusual? Because I usually do weird stuff. Did I clean mirrors? My mirrors are really clean, and I think I remember having windex..
Randomize
