my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
I feel violated. a guy just did an ultrasound on my balls. He made eye contact..
just learned how to wash a penis. thank you nursing school for getting me the most action i've had in months.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
While you were hooking up with her I pulled you off to make sure you knew what you were doing.
You said you were "testing the product for Chris."
I'm a bad man.
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And I wasn't CONVICTED of a felony, I just committed one
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
Just showed my drunk fiancé where I got circumcised, she's been crying for twenty minutes.
I had to say goodbye to one of my fuck buddies last night. He's voting for Trump, we shouldn't be doing it anyways.
I just woke up, its 6AM and i'm pretty sure the guy passed out next to me is 70% ugly...
what the fuck happened to the tacos
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