you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
nutella sex= disaster
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
They are currently going door-to-door asking the neighbors to donate money for Cheez-Its and gift wrap. They asked me to stay back at the house to make another pitcher of margaritas.
I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
Remember that time I sent you a 5lb bag of gummie bears?
Like it was yesterday.
Apparently I had it on auto deliver. So whoever is at your apt is gonna gen an interesting delivery...
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
It's not so much that I'm giving her money because I threw up on her floor. It's more like I'm paying her to never ever mention it again.
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
Randomize
