From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
You and I should start a club for people who woke up on outside on a bench with no idea how they got there.
20 yrs from now I just want to barge in her house and yell at her kids, "I took ur moms virginity!"
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
Last night he ate BBQ Pringles out of my boobs...I feel like it was moderately productive
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
Woke up on my sisters couch, and it was like the start of a Terminator movie,my brother in law was passed out on the floor naked in the fetal position. We now call him Arnold. It was an epic night.
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
The drive thru lady at McDonald's asked how I was and I responded by opening the car door and throwing up all over the drive thru lane. Happy Sunday.
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
Randomize
