talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
he was on top of me and all of a sudden stopped and starting picking his nose...i asked him if he was okay, he sort of looked confused, and he told me he had a booger that hurt. guess its a good thing i wasnt planning on dating this guy
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
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theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
The amount of my urine my roommate has consumed after I found out he's been eating my food almost offsets how angry I am
drunk her ninja stole one of the pizzas as it arrived and hid all of the pieces in a cereal box in the fridge.Genius.
The whole time we were fucking I kept thinking, "My dad would love this cologne. I'll have to ask him where he got it." the highlight of the night is that I figured out my dad's birthday gift.
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of jäger and an empty bed here Friday.
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You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
BRING KITTENS I AM A GENIUS
That's when I realized I was probably naked in the wrong bed
did you know that sneaking into a golf course at midnight is a felony? the cop made sure to tell us after she peed on the course and hit on him
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