You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We just passed a billboard that said to join "jerseydoesntstink.com" and literally 15 seconds later, we could smell jersey.
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
Dude. Why is there a hamster in my pocket? WHAT THE FUCK WAS IN THAT JOINT
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No, it's cool, I just bounced from the hospital. I was...talking to a security guard, maybe?
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
...and if you can get the necessary ingredients to make the Buffalo Chicken Melt, I will latch forever at your Teat of Justice.
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
An old Grimace plushie came to life and gave me a pretty knife. I'm never doing acid again.
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