you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"
I ended up driving home on my birthday, he opened the door to puke on the highway, and animal balloons were flying out of the car the entire time. The people behind us got a show.
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
Remember that picture you sent me of you trying to eat the flower arrangement in the bathroom at that restaurant?
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Look outside and see if the septic tank explodes when I flush this.
Future roommate keeps sending me pictures of cool shit she has for our dorm and I'm just like "... I have a set of Aggie wine glasses a great set of tits."
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
Took his shirt off. Announced he was Jesus. Threw up. Asked me to cuddle him to sleep. And then tried to kiss me. Typical Saturday night.
If I ever say "I'm never drinking again" just hand me a bottle of jack. I'll snap out of it.
You were so drunk Last night you asked for your glasses so you could read the directions on a band aid
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