so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, "rough nite? Let me find you some music" . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack.
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
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I'm about one sudden movement away from being able to cross "throw up in a fortune 100 company's bathroom" off my bucket list.
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
It has been so long since I got any action that I have decided to change my vagina's name from "the chamber of judgement" to "the cave of forgotten dreams".
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
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Yea... The gym isn't gunna happen today... When I was drunk last night I tried to prove I could front flip off the wheel cover of a semi... I fucked up my shoulder pretty bad... It was more of a roll
He cried & told me I reminded him off his mother. I don't want to talk about it. I want to drink about it.
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.