he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
I was barred out and drunk as fuck locked out at 3am in my Indian costume. It was literally freezing outside. I laid down on the concrete and made a bonfire with dry leaves. Then proceeded to ask.the.bonfire nicely to "please dont go out". Drunk me went strait up survival mode.
you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
Vodka drinking games. Where you wake up next to a douche lord and see your thong in the blinds.
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
And as drunk as I was I was able to show my mom how to make text italicized in Microsoft word
The whole time you were apparently enduring your pukescapades, I was singing very loudly in the car to Beyonce on my way to get a post-coitus Diet Coke.
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
Randomize