Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
I never thought that I'd ever use the phrase "and the resulting ice cream explosion" seriously at work...
his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is there any way to un-invite somebody to a wedding? I just checked out the other family, and I can't have a cockblock there.
I started making my dollar bills into rings for the strippers
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
I'm going out w/ her for her b-day in a bit. I just talked to one of her drunk friends on the phone who asked if I could "handle 7 lesbian." This could be interesting.
I think I fixed my testicle. That's why I didnt pay $25 for a doctor to do it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest.
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
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