I thought spray tan was a myth
?
You know, something that only happens in Jersey
the lady at Walgreens winked at me when i asked where the cherry chapstick was... damn u katy perry!
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
I just bought 1/2 a fifth of vodka out of an old school baby carriage from a homeless man. Gotta love this city.
They're letting me teach a freshman-laden class now. This university needs better background checks.
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
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