spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag.
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
I am significantly less than sober now. Gonna make like, ten hotdogs.
Pretty sure I sang "What Makes You Beautiful" to some random guy in a parking lot last night...
Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint.
He drops f bombs like every other word and he just gave me 127 shares of tmobile stock for free. I feel like I should pay him back in blow jobs or something.
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
Randomize
