woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
I'm literally beginning to think that my sex dreams are prophesies
You thought they were asking for volunteers for a karaoke contest so you jumped up not realizing it was actually a "last 3 minutes boxing match". But you took that right hook like a champ.
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
No we didn't fuck. He picked me up I asked where we were going and he said "I don't know if you've ever heard of a little place called Denny's?" He was completely serious. I told him to stop the car and I got out and called Jack.
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
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