I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
I almost got away with it until she smelled beer on the stroller.
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
How external is "for external use only"?
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
Randomize
