So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
You call it a hangover, I call it a baby squirrel burrowing its way out of my head.
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
4 people stoned, 3 boys I've slept with, 2 I gave chlamydia, and a partridge in a pear treeeeee
How festive
I'll get him an axe as a present. So he can break out of his closet. That axe being my penis.
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
I smell like hot dogs and captain morgan it's 11:20 am what is my life
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
New low: uploading my contacts into Facebook in an attempt to get the name of the girl I brought home last night.
Randomize