I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
I have one of those hangovers where you visualize how awesome it would be to climb in your fridge and drink glacier water
The Winnie the Pooh costume was great until you got drunk and started yelling at the kids asking for pictures.
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
He lasted less than 30 sec. in bed and then sent me a friend request on LinkedIn. Wtf.
and by running errands I mean eating an entire bag of milanos by myself in the Walmart parking lot
Randomize
