He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go.
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
Made a vodka juice box out of a ziploc bag and a straw for when I drive. Doesn't count as an open beverage container anymore.
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
I woke up with a bagel in my mouth, still ate it. Free breakfast
After getting rejected by him, I got a strangely pleasant dick pic from an unknown number with the caption: "I hope this gets you through the night ;)" It's like the Cock-Gods were shining down upon me.
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
Thanks for going with me today. It’s been a long time since I bought bra and panties because of a guy
It’s called “shopping for lingerie” and it’s one of the many exciting and sexy things that follow a divorce, along with sexting, sleepovers, and orgasms
But, our next lesson is picking up a younger guys at the bar!
Randomize
