Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
They thought I was the paid stripper pretty much, and a lady tried to set me up with her nephew and then wanted to get my number for lesbian daughter... A typical night for me
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
At least I know she didn't hear me crawl to my room. Or did I walk on my hands? Fuck if I know.
You were with some girl. Your exs best friend. Your shirt was half undone and she was telling you to put your penis away. It wasn't out but you wanted to. Patron is your weaknes.
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
Just woke up, shitty hungover, and realized that every article of clothing I slept in was backwards, bra included. Fuck you, gin. Fuck you.
So like, boobs.
are you really going to start every conversation like that?
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
I’m inviting a few of my favorite manwhores to a pool party. Bring booze and wear your banana hammock so Amy can see what I’m always talking about
Randomize
