is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
So. She dumped me today.
Well, maybe you shouldn't have referred to going down on her as "Dumpster-Diving".
Before you even think your day was worse than mine, I had to disinfect and and stitch another dude's penis after his prince Albert got ripped out by an angry chick.
I made $80 at the club last night by telling him he was like a wild pony and I just wanted to tame him
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
No more morning sex. Just for once, my vagina would like to go to work bone-dry and bone-free.
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
Randomize
