my facebook friend requests are always from girls of boyfriends i have fucked, facebook is the worst reminder of shame
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
He was completely serious when he said my boobs were like "majestic white clouds."
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
She kept saying the tortilla understood her. I honestly don't know where she found a tortilla at the pool.
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
We're listening to space jam. This can only be a good omen.
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
Randomize
