So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
I was going to call you an awful person for that. but then i realized we're both awful people.
Really* awful people.
she fucked me tho cuz it was her cat's birthday. As soon as we were done she just says "ahhh tequila tuesdays"
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
Make the kitchen floor stop waving. Im trying to lay on it
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
she just called me the flavor packet to her ramen noodles. get me the fuck out of here.
It's not an office Christmas party until your boss confesses his undying love for your boyfriend...
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
We got signed out of jail by an Uber driver. I think that qualifies as a great first night of college
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
Was expecting a sext from Kristi and then my mom randomly sent me a pic of her ugly Xmas sweater. Worst. Buzzkill. Ever.
I just swallowed confetti and motor-boated some guys beard...#happy2015
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
Randomize
