I want to give you a handjob with my mouth.
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
If I had KNOWN you and mom were coming to visit, I wouldn't have passed out in the frat. This is why I hate surprises.
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
You're still my best friend even though you continue to pass out on random toilets every time you drink
Woke up next to a half eaten Philly Cheesesteak. Honestly probably one of the top 3 things I've ever woken up next to.
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
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