I woke up this morning and I couldn't find my coffeetable. wtf?
it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked.
Standing here wondering if its a good idea to cook pork chops in the toaster or not.
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
Had to sacrifice my vibrator batteries to the thermostat gods. I had a dirty dream and also almost a heat stroke.
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
Unexpected pussy is the best kind. Never expected to get any from a stranger at my little brother's bar mitzvah.
Mazeltov!
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
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