I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
Note to self: when drunk try to remember that ctrl, alt and dance doesnt exist on a keyboard.
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
I'm 99.9% sure the people upstairs are using walki-talkies to talk to each other across the room. Too high for this shit
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
Funny how the post-sex UTI lasted longer than the entire relationship.
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
Babe, holding my hair while i blow you doesn't count as being romantic
Thanks for wearing matching bob ross shirts to the bar with me and referring to every guy as a happy little accident
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
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