whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
Having a race with the dryer. Seeing who can get drunk/dry clothes faster.
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
I don't think you understand. Its the best fauxhawk you've ever seen. I look like a gay dinosaur.
That's the most beautiful thing I've ever heard. Can I call you littlefoot?
I can pinpoint my loss of innocence as the moment I started masturbating with my teddy bears
Sunday is the day of rest.
As in, whatever liquor is left after last night, you have to drink the rest.
The two of us decided to throw a spur-of-the-moment parade and the next thing I know we're 4 miles down the road being followed by 65 drunk strangers
I'm pretty sure the girl in the stall next to me is waiting on me to leave so she can poop but I'm doing the same thing so it's like a Mexican standoff
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
Sorry I yelled at you and called you Amish and puked on your eggs
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
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