I changed my tire completely alone.. I could totally win survivor
Its my greatest physical accomplishment
she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
This bar receipt from last night makes no sense
You were wasted and got mad that it was too high so you subtracted 50 bucks in the tip line from the total
I wish that would've worked
i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If penises could fly, my ass would totally be an airport.
I GOT EATEN OUT IN A MERCEDES ON A TUESDAY NIGHT. I EARNED THIS SHIT.
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
I mean what are real friends for if they won't hold down your wedding dress to allow for a keg stand
hotel security told us you walked into the hotel with blood all over your dress, weren't wearing any underwear and were escorted back by three men who were believed to be "homosexuals".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.
We are finally out of the honeymoon stage of the relationship because it turns out that you can't come back from peeing on me in your sleep.
I did not get laid last night bc my condoms were too small. I'm allowed to be dreary
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
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