ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
hahaha! you have a girlfriend
tell that to the new girl at work who i screwed on the washing machine today...
Whenever I don't wipe thoroughly after shitting, I just think that anyone if anyone sticks their finger up my ass, they had it coming.
I'm like cupid
You're a whore with a bow and arrow
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
I got my little bro high for the first time... Turns out the two of us stoned together is a mess. We spent 10 minutes trying to communicate with each other using just our eyebrows.
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
College has done two things for me. Given me the confidence to blow my nose in public and shit in public
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
Randomize
