look no pants
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
guess who's eating a vending machine cheese danish, has no panties on, and is still the classiest bitch at this bus stop?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
I'm doing the Macarena naked in my living room right now
I see you're taking unemployment seriously.
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
I think my dove chocolate wrapper just told me to masturbate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
I appreciate the I'll come bail you out of jail tone in the text
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
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