I told her it just looked small because my balls were gigantic. She bought it.
I just told this girl who bought a pregnancy test "good luck"
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
We're trying to decide between cracker barrel an the ER
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
This is the I'm sorry text for running around yelling don't shit on my rainbow, end up in the fetal position crying at 4 am in my car because someone shit on my rainbow
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you know why I woke up with a half peeled lemon in my purse with a post-it that said "eat me" on it?
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
Thanks for listening. You're the first guy I've ever worked with who I didn't want to fuck.
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
Apparently the cops had to handcuff me in order to get me to come with to the hospital with them. They asked me if I had had any experience with handcuffs before and I replied, "Only in bed." What a life
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
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