no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
I remember three things: you falling down an entire flight of stairs, me stripping out of your Christmas one-sie to do cartwheels in my underwear, and people standing above me saying, "where did that bump on her head come from?"
Also, I was told I kept the antlers on the entire time. I'm deeming last night a success.
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
I think he's like 40 and maybe a little sociopathetic and i have never been so turned on
Another text to add to the intervention pile, i see
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
I'm trying to behave my vagina this week so I can at least pretend I'm honoring the sanctity of marriage
All I remember was you telling him there was something behind him so he would turn around and you could slide down his carpeted stairs on your belly without a shirt on. How's that carpet burn btw?
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
