Someone shit on the floor
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
Just so you know in the morning, yes you did send your bartender a snap of your boobs. No I didn't try to stop you because you used sound logic for doing so.
You know you've been on Tinder too long when you're the guy cropped out of the profile pic. Of a woman you're still seeing...
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
Randomize
