I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
I just wanna not walk straight. Is that too much to ask for?
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
Things you owe me: a sober apology, $12, the removal of bbq sauce from my doorknob
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
He fell off a seesaw, tore half his ear off and somehow convinced the paramedic he was allowed to have a beer while being treated
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
The universe is cradling this hangover like a gay couple cradles their newly adopted chinese baby.
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
I'm literally in my bed still trying to find the energy to take my corset off so I can binge eat oreos
Can you have a quarter life crisis another time? I'm trying to masterbate.