Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
At chipotle, there's a bachelorette party starting out the night here, i'm going to let you imagine what the bride to be looks like
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
Apparently someone switched my cash for monopoly money after midnight so I couldn't get any more drinks at the bar
In the middle of getting a blow job, she looked up at me and said "this isn't the first time I've done this today"
Saturday dinner is funfetti cake and merlot. Singlehood has come to this.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
This tiny Canadian guy just tipped me $20, a piece of gum, and a joint. I wasn't working. He literally tipped me for talking to him.
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
Tequilla is a sneaky bitch ninja that doesn't kick in until you least expect it. Then BAM! You're peeing in unconventional places.
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
Randomize