we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
I just snorted a line of adderall through a rolled up business card for the Michigan Law Admissions Office.... Tell me I'm not motivated
It's just a condom. Most people would commend me for saying I was going to start using them, and you're acting like I'm going to try heroin.
I had to download the flashlight app so I could finish taking a dump when the power went out.
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
Randomize
