carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
I wish i could call my weed and hear it ring. That's how i found my phone.
Just gave my manager part of my viccodin stash-my job is basically secured forever.
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major
If I don't get struck by a lightning bolt from God by midnight it will be a Christmas miracle.
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
So apparently my bro is going to make me fix his tattoo this trip... He sent me a pic of said tattoo. Tattoo is of a sperm, on his penis, which was in a woman's mouth... Wth
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
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