the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
Don't they also have a lot of serious head injuries?
I didn't say I wanted to marry one of them. Or that I want one to perform surgery on me. I just want to have hot, dirty, MMA style sex.
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
I fill condoms, not promises.
I taught her to play Monopoly. She sold me her bra to keep from going bankrupt.
Woke up in the ER with a nurse holding my tongue together inside of my mouth and a shattered jaw, the last thing I remember is opening the 151, care to fill me in?
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
if anyone asks you the platypus in my bathtub is a gift...thats all anyone needs to know
He set the tone in the back of his car by blasting Marvin Gaye's sexual healing before railing me
He’s basically a sexual superhero. A mild mannered marketing intern by day, but a very horny 22 year old with pornstar stamina at nights!
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