I just took a dump by candlelight. I feel like a pilgrim.
Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class
You insisted on drinking champagne out of the dog bowl
He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
Bruh why you gotta judge
You're awake at 3:30 in the morning RSVPing to a musical, I'm well within my means
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
there is puke in my bra ... again
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