Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You need to tell your booty call to take some sudafed or something. I swear I thought you were humping Kermit the frog last night
This from the guy I found eating salad out of a pot lid in his boxers on his porch last night.
I was gonna tell her, but there were too many tongues in my mouth
No more co-pays for contraceptives. Whoever says Obama is a bad guy has clearly never had a pregnancy scare.
I have a breathe right strip stuck to my forehead, several inexplicable bruises and I think someone tried to paint my nails with glue, but I still have my Santa hat. I'm gonna call this one a success.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
I had fresh baked oatmeal cookies, tacos AND was on deck to give a stellar blow job. You'd think that'd be a win/win/win situation.
Fuck. What bets did I make about "yeah when the Cubs win the World Series" that I gotta reneg on????
I'm all about clean living these days
You started your day with fried chicken and a bloody
... after you woke up in your own urine
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
I don't like kids.
You were literally holding a baby 5 minutes ago
I like them before they learn to speak and after they learn to think.
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