Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
we were shitfaced at work by 8pm. I had to stop myself from pouring vodka in everyone's cappuccino.
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
She called him at 5 AM so that he'd be ready for her birthday breakfast and drinks at 6. This is why people don't need to wait until their 21st to have their first drink.
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
Randomize
