sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
I haven't been "cry when you eat ben and jerrys" high in a while.
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got stood up on a date. They are singing "dancing with myself" on karaoke in my honor.
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
I just spent 20 minutes in a Subway trying to take a candid photo of the doppleganger of the guy I lost my virginity to instead of eating. That's all the evidence I need that my life is on track.
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Had a dream I went to Disney to visit you and then I got really drunk and puked all over these little kids in line
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
He called me for phone sex. Do you know how hard it is to fake an orgasm, and play Candy Crush at the same time?
Dude, he turned on “London Bridge” by Fergie and GAVE ME A LAP DANCE.
Randomize