is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
I'm going to get drunk on champagne by myself.
Oh no wait my cat's here. Thank god for a second there I sounded really sad.
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
Professor just informed us that she can't come to class today because her daughter broke her glasses and she can not see where she is going. Am I still drunk from this weekend?
Me sprinting out of your house without my bra or shoes is our entire relationship defined in a single moment.
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
By 9 pm this evening I'll have accomplished smashing with two different guys in two different time zones in the same day.
Stay hydrated
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
Randomize
