My pussy is not your playground.
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
I wish a box of wine came w a hose. It'd be so much easier to drink from.
You would be my first round pick for a drinking team
Hey have you ever thought about fishing cause I'd like to go fishing but don't know anyone that fishes and I'm gonna cry because. FISHING
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
We went to Olive Garden so high we didn't talk and managed to be awkward enough for the waiter to ask if it was our first date
Dude...are you really going to start sexting during our friend's memorial service?
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
THE COP WHO TOOK MY MUGSHOT LAST NIGHT JUST ADDED ME ON FACEBOOK
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?â€
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