I feel great
I just peed on a car
I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
I just want to let it be known that I almost put my phone in the fridge.
It sounds like I am drunk, but I am not. I just have a concussion.
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
He used pronouns for his penis while sexting. I don't know what I did to deserve this.
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
I mean, what's the polite way to say, "sorry but I can't date you cuz I'm sleeping with your boss" ??
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