your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
Someone took a freaking dump on a roll of toilet paper. Next to the toilet. No shit in the toilet. Just on the roll of toilet paper.
My moms helping me unpack but im getting a little nervous because I dont remember where i put my dildo
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
I was taking a bath and he burst in, sat down and started taking a shit. RIGHT BESIDE ME. My lack of privacy astounds me.
Sorry about giving you those ripped gym shorts after my dog ate your pants, but after the awkard BJ incident I didn't plan on hearing from you again
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
I can say with 87% certainty that i received one of the world's five greatest blow jobs since the Coolidge administration on Saturday night.
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
I keep finding granola in my bed. This is what I get for sleeping with a guy from Oregon.
I can't believe we broke the fucking lamp.
*i* can't believe believe we broke the lamp fucking.
Sitting in the car eating a bagel. Watching a guy do tai chi in the parking lot. My morning is fabulous
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
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