I miss you like a fat girl misses the prom.
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
21st Birthday Idea: liquor store gift registry. Give me a promotion.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
I may have just unintentionally roofied a man in a wheelchair
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
I don't need my coworkers thinking I'm a nutcase.
You gift wrapped a tampon.
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
I just delete my bank app from my phone to have enough storage to download tindr. Is this my life now?
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
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