Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
Holy christ fuck what has my trainwreck of a life come to just blew a 17 year old so help me god
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
It's end St Patricks day. I'm gonna need a leash. And a bib. And a rain check on anything considered dignifying.
At one point I was giving him a handjob and I started singing Call Me Maybe
I'm pretty sure I just gave myself third degree burns from punching my pizza.
I think I just pulled an onion peel off my boob from sleeping on their kitchen floor
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
You just can't go back to being friends with someone after you sucked their balls
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
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