And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
It took him longer to undo my bra than he lasted..
Brought out my three foot martini glass last night, that explains why I haven't left my bed all day long.
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
I've never seen the starbucks guy more terrified than when you dove out the car window after your credit card
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
Made out with a chick in front of a girl I'm banging and successfully reDENNISed her within 9 hours
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
Batchelotette party success. I woke up on the floor in nothing but a thong, a garter and a shirt that says Just Do Me.
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
Lessons learned from last night: do not leave me drunk and alone with strippers and a credit card. Let's do whatever's cheaper.
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