So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
Shark Week may as well be Shark Weed.
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
I woke up to the sound of a beer can being opened. I love him already
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
Was reaching for my vibrator this morning out of my nightstand and strained my neck muscle. I'm getting so old.
i gotta say this to some one...... my penis feels sooooooooo sooooooft, its amazing
like for real, sooooooooooooooo smoooooooooooooth its amazing
I can't wait for you to read this text tomorrow
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