I have funfetti in my underwear...will you come get me?
Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
Passing out is just my bodies way of protecting my liver.
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet.
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
My 7 yo sister is trying to talk my mom into buying her a strawberry margarita. Happy Cinco de Mayo.
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
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