12 pack with dinner. Living by yourself is awesome.
He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
you slapped the bag of goldfish out of her hands and screamed, "BITCH THIS AINT NO AQUARIUM". That's how fucked up
my friend was passed out in the bathroom so I threw up in the coffee maker, not the pot the water reservoir that kind of drunk.
Today, my weed came in a pokéball. I officially love my dealer.
He said he wanted to lick the breadcrumbs off my chest
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
Randomize
