i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
U of I kids don't fist pump to Sweet Caroline. Get me the fuck out of here.
Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
Any day you don't mysteriously wake up in the garbage is a good day.
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
Randomize
