lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
Sorry about teling your dad i'd have sex with him last night in front of your mom while i was drunk
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
You dislocated his arm and then bought him two shots to numb the pain while you pushed it back in
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
As he was going down on me, I looked over his shoulder and said "ohh a Christian mingle commercial is on"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
Sometimes you just gotta get high and go to a planetarium. Why can't he understand that?
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
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