Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
I need to start cutting my cocaine with Plan B
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
I'm using process of elimination to determine which of our neighbors i fucked last night.
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address...
The picture that pops up when I call her phone is a picture of my nipple. Just so you're forewarned.
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
Life is when you're laying naked in bed, eating Double Stuff Oreos with your boyfriend, blazed as fuck. Happy 4/20.
Ran into my statistics professor at the bar, he chugged a car bomb and yelled "x bar mothfucker!". On average I'm loving this PhD program.
He left cushions on my floor, chocolate on my bra and unexplained scratches on my thighs. I think this one might get a second date.
Randomize
